Okay, first off, helllloooo Turtle Rock. It’s been a loooong time, love you all, hope everyone is good. I dropped off the forums after Evolve development got shut down, if anyone remembers I played on PS4 so I never even got to experience any of the savage Stage 2 stuff and was salty it wasn’t coming to consoles. #Fuck2K #ThoseFuckingFucks
SO. Guess who went and built a PC, and decided to check on the status of his once-favorite-game-of-all-time. This guy, and lemme tell you I expected the player base to be down to the last loyal players, I expected there to be some unresolved bugs and long wait times… but the servers man? 2K shut down the servers???
2K is literally ROLLING in money!!! Let’s look at some of their titles, ever heard of BioShock? How about Civilization, Red Dead Redemption or Borderlands? Fucking GRAND THEFT AUTO. These guys have published some of the largest titles in gaming history, not including their crappy sports games they release every year, and they couldn’t keep a few low traffic servers online for an amazing game that THEY ruined??
What a load of stir fried GARBAGE. Those, those burp mother fuckers are so concerned over their billions of dollars that they can’t even devote some spare changes towards divvying crumbs for the better souls. (Aesop Rock reference.) I was willing to buy this game a second time, JUST to play as Glacial Behemoth. I wanted to roll up on mothafukkas sprayin em with my frosty juice. Buuuut nooooo, 2K just loooooves fucking me.
2k Head of Douchebaggery; “hey it’s been a few years since we fucked that guy Rick and the rest of the Evolve fan base, want me to go fuck em again?”
2k Lead of Corporate Bullshit; “Yeah go fuck those guys, happiness is for the RICH hahaha”
Both; “yeeeaaauuuh!!!” speeds off in their Lambo’s.
Anyways uh nice to be back, missed you guys at Turtle Rock, FUCK 2K.