I'm Looking for Opinions


#1

So as some of you may know, I got a Snow Leopard tail on Monday of this week.


But I’ve run into some problems with it. One being that my Mother doesn’t like me wearing it to public places like stores, restaurants, and malls. The other being that she also won’t let me wear it to school saying, “You’ll get unwanted attention and people will start picking on you.” which to some extent I agree with her.

Yet, I don’t fully understand why she’s doing what she’s doing. I know she wants to protect me, feeling that the chance of me being picked on at school will bring me back to the rather depressed me of awhile ago, but I don’t understand why she won’t let me just test the waters. I can stand up for myself, so if people want to pick on me for expressing myself with a tail then I won’t let it happen. I won’t stand idoly by as people harass me. I want to wear it all the time. It’s almost a part of me and helps me express myself. I enjoy wearing it and have a fun time doing so. I have friends who will always be there to support me, no matter what I do.

So I don’t agree with what my Mother is trying to do, but I understand what she’s trying to do. I’m looking for opinions on this. Should I be able to wear it whenever and wherever? Should I just be able to wear it to school? Should I only be able to wear it at public places? Should I only be able to wear it while at home?


#3

@Rick
Was this really necessary?


#4

@Shunty

I think it’d be fun to wear it at school even though it could be revoked. But it’d probably be better to wear it at home or on Halloween. But that’s my opinion


#5

You don’t NEED to seek out the unwanted attention though. There is a time and place for tail-wearing. It’s not about standing up for your rights to wear your tail. The school is like a private forum, like this one…sure, you have freedom of speech and can say what you want…but there’s rules, and I am sure the school would tell you you can’t wear it due to disruption and also that others will pick on you. This isn’t like wearing a turban or other religious adornment. There are many things worth fighting for but this simply is not one of them.

You can feel free to wear it into public stores, malls, or restaurants if you like (and they allow) or especially to a zoo, but not school or the workplace. Fun is fun, but school is school. There are legit reasons why you shouldn’t wear your tail to school and your mom is right…you’ve fought a lot of adversity in the past, why force yourself to face more of it now? This can only lead to bad things and I don’t just mean name-calling. Your mom is only looking out for you.


#6

Dude.

Just sit down and think for a minute and ask yourself “If I wasn’t a ‘furry’ and I was just an average Joe, would I be accepted into society?”

My answer to that is simply: Fuck no you won’t.

Your mother is looking out for you because she is part of mainstream which don’t see this as normal.

I mean, have you seen someone who actually wear’s that? Like, really?

It’s like this: You see someone on a swegway and from a normal standpoint, someone that doesn’t have a swegway, you would think it’s weird to see a man not using his legs and just rolling around. Same thing applies with having a furry tail.

Also, @Rick I can definitely see where your coming from and my first reaction was also wtf, but I think you should re-word it a bit.


#8

This makes it a lot more clear. As much as I want to, there are other things I should focus on.


#9

Yep, I have. Her name is Alexa and she wears it to school. She’s a close friend of mine. She isn’t a Furry though, she just really likes wearing the tail.


#11

And she doesn’t get discriminated?

Because you are a male and she is a female the men simply can not bully the woman. You wear that tail and you’ll be in a world of trouble.

Perhaps it’s better to talk to the principal first?


#12

I already have. It’s fine by them.


#13

It’s not going to stir up any good. You will get bullied the hell out of you, trust me.

It’s not good. There are times to wear it and times not to, publicity is not a place to wear it.


#14

Yet others do. I’ve already come to the decision of not wearing it to school. Sledge made it a lot more clear. I’m going to try to persuade my Mother to allow me to wear it to public places.


#15

Well all I’m going to say here Shunty is that your mother knows best.

She is your mother. The person that has known you better than anyone in this whole world.

She’s trying to look out for you because if something bad happens to you, something worse is going to happen to your mother. @SledgePainter can probably confirm this.


#16

Woah. <tencharsagain


#17

That’s the result of when I say you are her son/she is your mother lol


#18

I’m all for being your own man and living how you want however, the price of living in a modern society is you are expected to follow certain social etiquette.

Does school allow you to wear this? If not, don’t simple as that, most schools don’t allow accessories at all in my experience.

Now are you the age of majority where you live? If not, you should respect your mothers wishes. You are not just an agent of yourself, you are a representation of her as a parent and society may judge her harshly for your decisions, judging her to have “failed” even if that is not the case.

Now once you hit 18 or whatever the age of majority is, be your own person! But right now (if your under the Age of Majority) you are legally your mother’s responsibility and should respect her wishes.


#19

It’s not even about what you’re expected to do. You need to have a certain character to pull of going against the “norm”.

Not everything is about doing what you want in life, unfortunately, it’s also about doing what is going to holistically going to make you happiest. If your character is such that you can shrug off every teasing comment, every laugh, every abusive comment, every jerk taking it too far… then great, your happiness is purely derived from the fact you’re doing what you want. But if your character isn’t such that you can deal with all that, your resulting happiness will be that you feel like you are not able to be who you feel you are.

There’s a reason why some people don’t “come out” as gay while others do it as soon as they know they are, of course the primary reason is bigotry and prejudice, but the reason when you boil down to it is that some people know that they live a happier life being themselves in private and masking it in public. Is it right? That’s up to the individual to say.

You should be able to wear what you want in public (and be openly gay without issue, to tie up the analogy), no-one will deny that, but you have to think about the overall effects, positive and negative, on what you want to do from all sources. If wearing it in public is going to risk your mental wellbeing, and is going to put a strain on your family relationships… have you considered what the resultant effect on your friends will be? have you asked them about it?.. then I have to wonder why you’d want to subject yourself to that for little more than the principle of it all.


#20

I have told my friends about it, I even showed them the tail. They all said that it was a little weird, but that they were not going to act differently about it. They’re going to support me.

As for how my family has taken it, it’s been good. I came out to them about being bi-sexual along with being a Furry. They had a lot of questions to ask, but they said they’d support me. They care for my well being and want me to be happy. They’re just a little afraid of what others will do, which explains why they don’t want me wearing it outside the house.


#21

This.

Now that’s a lie, blood is thicker than water so your parents can be trusted, but your friends are going to talk about some nasty shit behind your back, possibly even spread rumors. It happened to me many times, no matter how close I was to that person.


#22

No, it’s not a lie. These are people I’ve been friends with since the beginning of highschool. People I’ve been friends with when I attempted suicide. People I’ve been friends with when I told them I was bi-sexual. People I’ve been friends with when I was fighting my body collapsing and was on the verge of going into a coma.

These are friends. These are great people who will be there when I need them.


#23

I’ve had friends that I knew since I was 5 who backstabbed me when I thought I could trust them.

Anyway, it’s your opinion, if I just keep trying to get you to change your mind your foot’s just going to be planted further into the ground.

Your choice at the end of the day.