I'm done. I'm tired, I'm beaten, and I give up. Goodbye (April fools)


I’m done with Evolve. Today I logged in and well… Ugh, fuck.

You remember how people used to get that bug where they lost everything, characters, skins, levels, all that? And the new patch supposedly FIXED IT!? Yeah, that was all bullshit.

I have officially lost Slim, Crow, Behemoth, all my skins, and every character besides T1. I am so unbelievably pissed, you have NO IDEA.

I have stood behind this game for so long. I knew it was broken. I knew it was buggy as hell. I knew everything in it was just DESIGNED to suck the cash from your wallets. But I was ignorant. I believed in it. I believed it would get better. I believed in this community, which was always so reassuring and confident. And worst of all, I believed in TRS.

I didn’t want to resort to it, but knowing how shitty 2K’s customer support is, I called a member of my family who works for 2K who’s name, sex, and every other personal detail I shall not disclose for obvious reasons. They stated that they pretty much couldn’t do shit for me. They stated that since they had seen me with Elite Lazarus and at Level 27, I would get Elite Laz and Level 27 back, along with Tier 2. I WAS LEVEL 40 WHEN I WAS RESET. I HAD HYDE AND KRAKEN ELITED. THIS IS COMPLETE BS. And they can’t fucking help me because they don’t have DEFINITIVE PICTURE PROOF THAT I HAD ALL THE SHIT IM SAYING I HAVE.

“I believe you. But the others won’t. If you don’t have proof, I can’t clear it. Sorry, buddy.” Fucking asshole.

This is… Not saddening. It’s disappointing. I feel PITY, for TRS, and the rest of you that have been caught in it’s clutches. I am so done with this game… Ugh, FUCK.

This is my official resignation from Evolve. Tomorrow I will be returning the disc to gamestop to at least get SOME of the money I spent on this god awful excuse for a game back. I suggest you all do the same before TRS sucks you in too far.

You know what the worst part is? The most god awful, ridiculous thing that came out of this whole experience? It wasn’t the betrayal by TRS. It wasn’t the initial shock of seeing I had lost EVERYTHING. It wasn’t even the betrayal by my douchebag relative. No, it’s the fact that

today is April fools day I love you all so sorry buhbye

And here is another FUCKING POINTLESS paragraph so that some lil’ shits WON’T just scroll down to the bottom and see that this was a joke. Like legit, WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE ACTUALLY DO WITH YOUR LIFES besides scroll to the bottom and RUIN MY FUN AND HAPPINESS WITH YOUR CRAP!? I mean, I like almost everyone on the forums, but if you scroll to the bottom, you are on my list of enemies. God damn tldr. And one last intense sentence for dramatic effect.



Can we please have the Bat Ray back?

Goodbye then.



Desolas, read. :slight_smile: He’s joking. :stuck_out_tongue:



Maybe he was jumping in on the joke (or he’s one of the people just scrolling down ;))

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…Deepest of apologies, @Desolas.



Later then Tate, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

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Hush. It’s spelled “quiet.”

Later Tater. :stuck_out_tongue:

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@Rapterror This made me think wtf is wrong with our rapty at first. but then i saw it and now i dispice you



You’re the first one that got me today… Well played but still fuck you :wink:



you got me dude this is well written xD



I’ve been had like seven times. To be fair I also pranked a guy back once.





Shun the nonbeliever!



Ok i’m done with the forums today.



Why? Can’t handle the fact that I’m leaving, you Evolve-Loving Fanboi? :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

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With every new topic i have to scroll down to see if it’s a joke or not… And you leaving? Didn’t believe it at all, you love us too much to leave :stuck_out_tongue:



He doesn’t like me anymore, so he’s leaving… I tend to have that effect on people.

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Oh no worries I read to the end.



For the record, I read all of it ^^



I really do. :heart: