I feel sorry for you all


Oh god when I first read the title I thought this was going to be a “ughh the dlc sux yu all suk evolve sux hehehe i aintt bying yer game if it no has splitscreen” kind of thread.


I played only a couple pubs… And all of them had a terrible Trapper. I may not be the brightest Assault out there, but I sure as hell can’t do my job unless THE TRAPPER DOMES IT.

You miss an arena, that’s fine. But when you keep it up for 20 seconds after you saw the Monster run…


Yeah I just started mostly playing Trapper for this reason. I am not the best player but I like to think I am above average.


The one match that stood out to me was when our medic was trying to play as an assault, right in the monster’s face and not healing bursting or using the glove to rez people. This was after dragging out the character select lobby spamming “let me be medic” over the mic until the person swapped so we could move on. Not the only time a medic played like an assault but just the time i recall most.

As for me I remember getting caught by the same plant 3 times in a row somehow lol.


I dropped into the middle of a match in the beta as Lazarus. The two players on assault and trapper were basically exchanging constant insults about each other’s playing ability, while the monster sat on top of a tower. knocking down anyone who came near. Then, of course, as soon as he came down and started to kill everyone (Stage 2), the insults turned to me, for not reviving them instantly as soon as they fell. We ended up losing, but only after the assault player dropped into the tyrant pit immediately after complaining about my ability to heal him.

Easily the most incompetent team of pubs I ever played with. I was laughing so hard XD


My team getting Killer by carnivors plants because they stand behind and i was folowing the monster

And as an monster where i won without even fighting the hunters because wildlife Killed them


The crowning achievement of the beta for me was the standard stage-3 bossfight survival trip.

Goliath is at 2 bars of health, chilling. Tearing everyone apart, no big deal.

I’m Caira. Goliath goes on me, I pop acceleration, and run for the hills, kiting the monster as best I can. Hank shields me, gets a rock to the face and dies.

I go down, finally. Monster at 1 bar. Question why Goliath’s 2 bars of survival aren’t dropping. I look around in my “downed” state… Notice a highlight through a wall.

Markov. Standing on top of a truck, with his machine gun… Shooting at a rock. Reloads. Unloads on the rock, again.

“I’m shooting his tail!” he says.

I laughed so hard I couldn’t even be mad.


I saw all sorts in the Beta, but people generally got to be at least decent and often enough good.


My first time playing… Let’s just say I am one of those gamers that loves to see very nook and cranny of the world and am always looking for anything I can loot or take. I know Evolve has nothing really hidden away but I was so distracted with the maps the first time I played in the Alpha. It ended up with me always being the last one to the slaughter party. I know I pissed off quite a few and to them I apologize, but I just really wanted to see the world that was created. No worries now though i got it out of my system, so lets get to huntin.


During the beta, the majority of my matches were with teammates who were absolutely terrible. I almost decided not to buy the game because of this, until I realized that in an open beta you are going to get a large number of players who don’t know how to play the game and don’t even understand the concept of it. People who actually commit to buying it will in most cases also commit to learning how to play it competently. Also, as time goes on the, the players who do not adapt will move on and leave, creating a smaller but more skilled community


Actually it does. There are secret cupcakes hidden around the world of Shear so you’ll love finding those! And this isn’t a joke, there really are! There’s a thread floating around where we’ll be putting where we found them when the game releases. I recommend you help us out and watch it :smiley:


Oh god, for the first month I feel sorry for my team mates.


yeah certainly at rank 20-30 there were more good teams.

people who say otherwise played one game or quit at rank 10


Worst game in Alpha= Ran put of jetpack fuel and fell into plant. Everyone walked right by me. That same game and I ran out of fuel (again) and a Megamouth got me. The trapper throws down a dome and doesn’t take it down the entire time.
Worst moment in Beta= Thay one game when all 3 of my teammates left since the monster was Wraith.


I actually like newer players, and the ones on evolve most of the time wanted to learn new stuff, and the only bad thing that ever happened to me in both the beta and the big alpha was that one time my team ignored me while i was getting eaten by a carnivore plant.


I didn’t had a lot of really stupid moments except maybe for one session. I played 2 games with a guy who believed he is the most amazing Evolve player in the universe and would tell everybody which hunter in each class to play and how to do it. And then he never EVER used a shield as Hank and blamed me (playing Medic) for how fast our team died to monster. My poor brain cells…


My stupidest moment? The crown jewel of stupid moments :ok_hand:

Finally managed to land a decent team w/ great communication & knowledge of the game, so we decided to split up into teams of 2, yeah?

Me (Support), Lazarus - Team 1
Assault, Trapper - Team 2

Team 2’s a good way’s distance from us but I stumble upon an elite w/ a buff, so why the hell not? Let’s kill it real quick.
I kill this elite Nomad with w/ maybe a sliver of my health left (I’ve got Lazarus behind me, I didn’t care) and I go to pick up this elite’s buff–but not before I get downed by a Reaver who managed to sneak up on me. So, I’m sittin’ there and I finally die on top of this Nomad’s corpse, right? Lazarus is coming so I’m not really sweating it much–he gets there and goes to res me (remember, I’m dead on top of this Nomad’s body), and accidentally revives the f-ckin’ Nomad instead of me.

So we’ve got the Goliath doing work on the distant Team 2 while I’m dead & Lazarus is getting his butt probed by a zombie Nomad.

I’ve never facepalm’d so hard in my life :see_no_evil:


Actually, that situation was avoidable, if u let the reaver eat the body :wink:


for the most part, the people that were “stupid” in my opinion were in the original Alpha. I can’t give a large amount of specifics, having agreed to their NDA (as if we don’t know what was in the original by now) but if i were to put it into terms of say, Big Alpha/Beta gameplay, it was simply that people didn’t know what their characters did and didn’t want to listen to me about it during the Alpha.

As for stupid moments in other test modes, during the Big Alpha my absolute worst one was this Lazarus…

Obviously he had to have played the medic (we queued up together in the select screen, he chose Laz and didn’t disconnect so it wasn’t some guy who took his place either) enough to have earned Lazarus playtime… but it sure didn’t seem like it. Not only that, but the other two people, Trapper and Assault, had absolutely no idea that Lazarus could revive someone with their gauntlet. which actually was fine because Lazarus had no idea he could revive someone with his gauntlet. He literally walked to me, not cloaked, while the monster was derping, and picked me up manually.

I tried using my headset to communicate how Lazarus’ skills worked, and the next time i went down, he walked up cloaked (he got one of the skills right at least) and then picked me up manually.

The only reason i wasn’t in absolute rage-mode levels of irritated at this person is because miraculously between our assault and myself on Bucket, we managed to kill the monster…


Well, you see, the underside of a Reaver bears a stunning resemblance to a Monster’s belly, especially if you’re panicked. Seeing as they lunge at your head, you’ll usually see its belly should it attack you. Well. I was Trapper, turned around quickly with the dome out, saw a reaver’s stomach, freaked and domed it. Meanwhile, the Monster evolved to two right outside.