I. Fucking. Hate. Religious. Bullshit. I swear to fuck (because God doesn’t exist) that religion has caused more problems for the world than it has to solve them. The fact that you can’t accept your son being gay and won’t let him make his own choices is straight up mental retardation. I’m very sorry to hear about your situation. They can’t do shit to sue you if you’re both over the age of 18 btw. Fuck those bigoted assholes.
It’s not fair to blame all bigotry on religion. People can be bigoted without being religious. Some people hide their bigotry behind dogmatic law, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that without religion they’d be better people.
You’re not wrong. I’ve never met a bigot who isn’t religious though. And I’ve met a fair few. A bunch of closed minded people who think others should burn due to their orientation. Nonetheless I stand by my statement, but that’s a discussion for another time.
I mean, only his mom is religious, but his dad is a traditionalistic fuck brought right from the 18th century. He once pushed my boyfriend down the steps in a hall in their house for defending same sex marriage… He calls him a fag for crying, and he says it’s okay to have fags as friends, but they should not be allowed to do whatever the fuck they want.
I swear, they should be so proud of him. He’s so smart, kind, educated; he was a fireman before entering college; he’s part of rotaract, a rotary club branch for young people; he plays the piano, writes poetry and knows a bit of French and Portuguese… Like… He’s done so much and he is such a great person that, reasonably, they should ignore his sexuality completely… Fuck them… My boyfriend even told me he would get the hell out of that house as soon as he had the chance, so if he hasn’t done it it’s because there’s some serious shit going on in that house. I don’t wanna intervene either because I might fuck things up even more…
I am in the process of trying to open up a new store cause up until now I have been at my dad’s pharmacy. We’ve been checking out places and the experience can be summed up by the image below.
So far, each and every shop has had a price and a rent that failed to justify either its deplorable current condition or to justify debts due to poor previous management or take into account the circumstances in which the economy finds itself right now. Everybody wants to fuck you over. Friends, colleagues, acquaintances. Every single one.
And then people wonder why Greece is the way it is. Dog eats dog, welcome to the jungle.
So, I got my first gf yesterday on Valentine’s. That was fun I guess
So were you a medic in evolve, or what?
I was mostly a Lennox during my day but I could play a mean Laz even against Behemoths with a good enough team
They can’t do that because he is of age. Both of you are old enough, I don’t see how they can stop you?
Sounds like the financial blackmail is doing the job.
Either way, horrible to hear about your troubles there @JedeOff, absolutely not right in todays day and age.
My parents insisted on talking to them personally, and it seems they’re going to charge me with harassment… For asking two people to be my allies to find out information about him. Apparently all of them sent the screenshots of our conversations to my boyfriend’s parents.
They said their son had already called me and explained the reasons why he didn’t want to keep seeing me (he never explained why, he just told me to stop bothering me with a trembling voice before his dad took his phone and threatened me.)
They sent him to a shrink… A fucking shrink… I feared this could happen but I never thought it actually would… “He’s not well defined yet.”
And I also managed to talk to his sister, who seems very compelled to make my life hell if I try to come anywhere near her brother. “I’m gonna call my parents if you ever try to contact him or if I find out you talked to him.”
Fuck them… They’re fucking toxic and sick… I just wanna get my boyfriend out of there…
I swear I’ve done nothing wrong, and it may seem I’m the bad guy here, but I swear they’re blowing everything so much out of proportion… I’m helpless.
As hard as it might be to hear, the best thing for you to do to help him right now might be to not press on with this. It’s clear from what you are saying that the more you try to reach him, the more he is likely to be punished as a result. It may seem like giving up, but perhaps waiting until he isn’t so under their control might be the answer?
Have you ever thought that they act this way because they’re ashamed of themselves? That his parents raised a child that they see as an absolute failure, simply because of him gay? I’m not saying this justifies anything, but it gives reason. I think it’s best to get you, your boyfriend, and his family in a small room with a certified counselor.
The only reason I insisted was just to get an answer directly from him… But every attempt failed because nobody I asked cooperated. I’m now much more calm and willing to wait though ever since my parents talked to his.
@Shunty … I do think they’re ashamed of their son… They’re so old fashioned they even said I was discrediting their son by talking to other people about our relationship. I’m not their enemy… But they seem to hold a huge grudge against me. Of course, I get it. Despite being bigoted and everything, it’s still hard for them and they’re acting the only way they know how to react… And I don’t think they’ll want their kid to be miserable the rest of his life.
I wouldn’t expect them to “hate” their son forever. This is something that needs discussion. This is a two way street, his parents need to come terms with their son and understand what’s going on, and he needs to find a way to make them both comfortable with the situation.
I’ve had a similar situation a few months ago. I started dating a guy, first time I had done so, and my parents didn’t react very well. My mother was very shocked about the whole thing. She didn’t know what to say, and was rather reluctant. My dad had a very bad reaction. I told him about my boyfriend and he began shouting, yelling, and being physical with me. This lasted a few weeks, but eventually he came around.
I think the reason they normalized the situation was because that’s what I did. I didn’t treat myself as special or that me being gay was different. I took things naturally and left it as that.
Now, I also feel there’s another reason as to the normalization. I’m no where close to the typical “gay” guy. A lot of my friends call me the straightest gay guy they’ve ever seen. I don’t wear my sexuality on my sleeve. This might be another reason why his parents aren’t reacting well. But that’s just an assumption.
I have seen parents do horrible things to their children just because of their sexual orientation, I agree though, he can try to make them understand, but he should know that some people just won’t change and he shouldn’t be hard on himself just because they don’t accept him.
If that approach doesn’t go well then I think he should just play along until he finds a way to be financially independent.
Of course. There are plenty of situations where things go south real quick, but there’s always a chance.
I’ve come to terms that everyone outside of my immediate family will not take me and my sexuality lightly. Every family visit I get asked “Got a girlfriend yet?” and I always say no. I can’t tell them anything else. But that’s fine with me. Me being gay isn’t my life. It’s not the most important thing in my life, it’s just a factor. I don’t need to have these people in my life, because if they can’t accept me for who I am, they aren’t truly my family.
I respected you before and I respect you even more now.
I’m not the “gayest” guy you’ll meet. Not one of my friends knew I was gay until I told them, because I don’t have the usual “girly” gestures some gay guys have (not meaning to sound insulting or anything, but we have to agree that several gay guys have more girly gestures and ways of talking).
I know they, as a family, are going through a rough time. They have their beliefs and their son just ran over all of them with a mining truck and pretty much demolished the status quo. It’s even more painful that he lied so much to disguise our relationship. And I guess I’m not really helping by insisting.
Tthey’ve treated him so badly in the past that I can’t help but worry about his well being… The psychiatrist, having his sister follow him around like a freaking bodyguard; taking away his cellphone and laptop. He hasn’t been able to talk to anybody outside of his sister’s circle of friends. She says he’s fine, they all say he’s fine, but I don’t trust them one bit.
I am going to say that what you should do is to leave them all alone for maybe a week or more don’t call don’t email don’t even look at the house. It sounds horrible I know but you may have to do this. Once everything dies down try to contact him again but only once and if it doesn’t work wait another week then try again. You don’t want to sound pushy and aggressive by trying to contact any way you can.