How to deal with a parent that always hurls insults at you


#21

I don’t want to make it seem like I am one those stories you hear about some perfect angel who has been abused for his or her whole life. I’m not, i am not a great person, I’ll admit. But I just don’t fucking get how a parent would just verbally abuse their kid all the time.


#22

What she said was not ok, by any stretch. However, CPS is serious business…do not call them into the situation lightly unless your life depends on it. I would suggest going to see your school counselor…there ought to be one, and use them as a sounding board for what is happening in your life and how you feel. They can maybe suggest courses of action. Parental bullying does exist unfortunately. I assume you brought to her attention the things you do for the family? And your sibling, does she get similar brow-beatings?


#23

When she yells at me, I really have no choice but to just listen, because there is no point of saying anything. She won’t listen.

Also, my sister doesn’t get that treatment, but she will sometimes still get yelled at.


#24

May I ask if you are both siblings of the same mother and father?


#25

Yes. We are.


#26

Walk away?


#27

Ok, I only ask because sometimes there can be issues with siblings not related to each other. Have you tried, in a calm voice, to ask why your mother is so upset while she is yelling down at you? A low, slow voice sometimes will stop it, sometimes no…and remind her of the things you do do?

This tells me there is a lot more to her own issues than you. It is entirely possible she feels like the failure in this situation and is using you as a punching bag. Can you speak with your father even though he is far away? Was she like this prior to your father leaving?


#28

We live in a rather small house…


#29

She was definitely not like this before. This has been going on for 4 months now.

I don’t really know how my dad would help honestly. My mom really doesn’t like him either. So she won’t really care what he says.


#30

I’m going to be slightly blunt here, but please don’t take it the wrong way. A gaming website is not the best place to ask for this kind of advice.

However, if this situation is truly making you suicidal, it needs to stop. Now. If you are not willing to reach out to the proper authorities, you should at least talk to your guidance counselors at school. Or even a favorite teacher. Someone who can actually do something.


#31

The important thing is to talk, if not with social services than at least someone you can trust, a friend, a school councillor.

Know that you are not alone, there are others who are in this situation. Don’t let what your mother says get to you, because there are people who care for your well-being. We care.

And I’m sure that the last thing people want is tk break a family apart. Perhaps, just like @SledgePainter said, perhaps your mother might need emotional guidance but is too afraid to seek it. In that case reporting it to someone and allow a professional to step in can be good for both of you.

If you want to just talk to a professional, perhaps see this help hotline here: http://www.thehotline.org


#32

The first thing I would do is to speak to the school counselor. Make an outside authority aware of the situation. Then, you can work on confronting your mother in as calm ( and possibly a useless) a way as possible, to help stem the tide of hate against you. At least make your mother aware that her words are hurting you, and you feel like you are trying to please her but ultimately she is unhappy with you and you are sad for this. Trying to placate her with a soft tone can help…or it may not…but at least you gave it a shot. Then speak again with the counselor and go from there. Speak to your father as well, as he may be able to help, you never know, even over the phone. Also, I don’t know how old your mother is but you never know…menopause could be a thing, or some kind of emotional trauma right now that she is unaware of and needs to deal with. Obviously something is there affecting her life in a negative way and she is taking it out on you.


#33

#34

I’m sorry to have to close this topic but the forum is not the place to seek help for domestic issues.

I’d highly suggest attempting to discuss issues with your mom in a calm and straightforward manner. Should that fail contact your school guidance personnel or child protective services and seek assistance there.