Everyone's OP (A Poem To Relay How Crazy This Forum Is)


#1

I wrote a little poem,
It’s just for you and me,
And to follow the forum’s trend,
It’s called ‘Everyone’s OP’.

You see Maggie’s dog is hard to lose,
and Hank’s shield isn’t fair.
He’s not Assault, that’s not his job,
And the devs don’t seem to care!

Hyde’s fire goes a bit too far,
And Abe’s Nades last for far too long,
And Cabot’s range of ‘infinite’
Seems to be a little strong.

The kraken’s flying far too fast,
it makes it hard to hit,
The goliath tanks too well for me,
And wraith? That piece of ****.

Bucket’s head just can’t be beat,
Nor can Markov’s mines,
And Griffin’s permapoon gun,
Has many monsters in a bind.

And Parnell? Please, don’t start with me,
His rockets hit too fast,
Just how can I beat someone,
who can cut his health in half?!

Val and Caira can HEAL UP?
Not fair, devs, hear my call!
At least Lazarus can’t do that-
OH WAIT, HE REZZED THEM ALL.

The plants chomp me to bits,
The mammoth birds all zap me dead,
And the hell is wrong with crowbill sloths,
after four shots to the head?!

AND DON’T EVEN BRING UP OBSIDIAN GRUBS,
Those guys should be removed!
So should striders, Ebonstars, turrets, nomads,
They’re all throwing off my groove!

UGH, I guess it’s up to me,
to lead us on the path we need.
We ought to shut down the entire game,
because EVERYONE’S OP!

(I’d just like to say I love evolve and this is just a joke post, do not take this srs.)


Everything is OP please nerf
I think your "OP"
Everyone's UP! (A Poem by Mortalbou- ...Wait, what?)
Everyone's OP: The Rhymening
Wraith - should Decoy be this powerful?
#2

that shit was deep af spit fire preach it to the flock moses


#3

And lo, the lyrical gods said ‘lol’


#4

I… I love this. This is amazing and I shall from now on direct people who scream OP constantly to this post.


#5

Well done, sir.


#6

Please do. I hope to create a sort of mirror for them to look into.


#7

@mortalbound is truely a gift from the gods


#8

Perfectly captures the mood here in the TRS forums! Just need someone to make this into a song now :smiley:


#9

Awesome! .


#10

Awesome things inspired it.

The awesomeness that is Evolve, the game.

The awesome sillyness of OP-whiners in the forums.

Everything is awesome!


#11

So deep. Much emotion. Pultzer prize needed.

Someone should turn this into a theme song for evolve


#12

I like how this far cleverer and more entertaining thread went up at the same time as my shite circlejerk thread that says basically the same thing.

Glad to see I’m not the only one who feels like this.


#13

Gonna be honest, I saw your thread and immedeatly went “Oh crap, I’ve started something terrible” XD

Really it’s not a complaint about the game. It’s just that I’m tired of seeing people say things are OP! Cause you know what?

…You know what? I believe it was the words of ‘Syndrome’ in the incredibles, slightly modified for context…

…When everyone is OP - Nobody is.


#14

Damn fam when the mixtape dropping?


#15

I just tried recording myself in audacity to see if I could do it.

I sound awful.

Someone else sing it.


#16

There is some creative shit going on in your mind. I will gladly help to further this cause haha.

PS. Any time we will see a video parody of this?


#17

That was magical. :sparkles:


#18

Well done!

And on that note, I’m actually very GLAD that the forums have turned in to “XYZ is OP” and “How to fix the game” because… that tells me people are playing, enjoying it, and care enough about the game to want to see it get better. “Better” is obviously highly subjective and personal, but if people weren’t really getting in to the game they wouldn’t care enough to complain about their pet peeve. I take it as a good sign!


#19

Don’t worry, I didn’t read this before posting - I crapped that thread out of my own volition. It wasn’t what you had done, but what the forums HAVE been doing, in other words.

The term “OP” is bandied about with such frequency on this forum so as to render it meaningless. And what is perhaps stranger is the way posters seem to use Buzzfeed clickbait titles on the threads where they suggest ways to “restore” the perceived imbalance - “you’ve gotta see this one weird trick to make your Wraith more fun!”

I can’t agree more with that sentiment which Syndrome expressed, and that scene often comes to mind when browsing here. in a game of superhuman hunters with high-tech gadgetry fighting colossal monsters, you’re dealing with a lot of power on both sides. It’s not surprising that people cry op so often, when the whole game really is relatively OP.


#20

I’d almost like to see it as ‘Everyone who can’t deal with the intensity of EVOLVE come to the forums to complain about it’. And everyone who can deal with it is too busy actually playing to bother with us. XD